Social Life Hoarder

IThe new song Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots has quickly become my favorite song.  It keeps playing in my head over and over again lately since it pretty much describes me to a T.  Once I finally realized life was becoming too much to handle, I've had to make some major changes in my social life.  I began to look for areas that were causing me unnecessary stress.  Sure, the major ones are probably permanent and I can't just toss them out the window, so I had to find those other smaller areas that were not so obvious and but were more easier to change.


I can't even tell you how much saying BYE Felicia to Facebook has DE-STRESSED my life!  While you may not be ready to say goodbye to Facebook yet, it has a feature called "Unfollow".  It sounds like Twitter's "unfollow" where you basically completely delete that person from your life, but on Facebook, it simply allows you to not view their ridiculous feed in your home page. This has brought me so much peace.

I tell you, this has to be Facebook's best feature ever!  Some people were just driving me insane with all their bullshit but they are "family" so I HAD to just put up with it.  Some family members tend to be notorious for getting on my nerves and this feature is perfect for these situations where you don't want to be rude but at the same time you want to politely keep them from stealing your sanity.

So I began combing my Facebook feed and I UNFOLLOWED most of the following:
the annoying (so many... let's narrow it down)
the always angry 
the vulgar 
the too slutty (a little is ok)
the incessant selfiers 
the liars (If you lie and I don't know, we're cool)
the excessive braggers (once is enough)
the "fake" religious (stop pretending! Yes, God reads your Facebook)
the complainers (bummers)
the sad (even worse!)
the assholes (you know who they are)
the Trump supporters/Hilary haters 

I know what you're thinking, so who's left?! Good point. Turns out there are plenty of normal people out there, they just get covered up by all the trash. I'm not saying I'm not one of these over in a while, I'm talking about the constant ones that wake up and go to sleep filling up my page with selfies and junk. Enough already!!! 

Pretty much we all encounter one of these here and there and out of respect, you can't possibly tell them to just SHUT IT!  I wish it was that easy but unless I'm trying to avoid a massive family feud, just hit that "unfollow" button and all your problems will quickly be solved.  Ahhh, if only life was this easy. Well, at least this one.

This pretty much goes the same way for any other social media site that is driving you crazy.  Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and whatever other app we waste our lives on.  At one point, I felt completely avoiding my own pages as they were wild and out of control.  I had to take the reigns and by unfollowing many annoying distractions, I began to feel more in control of my social life.  But just in case unfollowing is not enough, I had to take it a step further.


If unfollowing is not enough for you, let's face it, it never is.  The main addiction still stands and that's the whole entire Facebook app.  There is this beautiful thing called "passive barriers", where the basic premise is that we tend to be lazy by nature, so if you want to keep yourself from doing something just create a small barrier.  This small barrier in our Facebook addiction, for example, is the much dreaded "sign on" button.  Just the thought that you have to look for and find and then type in the long and difficult password is enough to make our naturally lazy selves just give up.  You eventually train your lazy brain that if you're going through ALL THAT WORK, it better be for something real important.

I tried this for about a month and while at first I felt like a newly withdrawing crack head, after a week I began to stop hyperventilating.  True story.  We can finally be thankful to our lazy nature as for one it is good for something.

What if you don't have this naturally lazy feature in your DNA? Then there's only one last thing to do...


When nothing else fails, delete the freakin app and be done with it.  There's no other way.  Logging out was enough for me since I am notorious for having these kind of passwords: LI3F:I*^%*8#()#*(#*$&SI&jie37&^%.  There was no freakin way on earth I could memorize that password but if your password happens to be, well, "password", then yeah deleting the whole app is best for you.

So this is it, this is not rocket science but I had to finally make the decision to take control of my real life by first taking control of my "social life".  I felt 10 pounds lighter and 10 years younger.

Try it. :)