Where did my motivation go?
Often times, ok most times, I go under the radar. That's ok because I wanted it that way, I mean I have loads of Diaries to talk to all about me anyways, why would I post anything about my personal life here? It's online, and public and that's a scary place. So then I began to think. Why have I suddenly become so unmotivated to write? Why have I gone silent? Why did my motivation go out the door and never looked back? I mean there were so many interesting things that happened this past year to talk about. We took a ten state family trip for God's sake, so why didn't I write about that?!
Then it finally hit me and I began to the problem, I worked on me. I had to. I finally realized I had lost myself, my purpose and my direction and it was all due to life. This messy thing we call life. This is not easy for me to do, but it's a start. Getting personal means being honest with myself and I'm just getting to that point where I feel comfortable doing this. Baby steps, baby steps.
I guess I never really wanted to share until I had something important to share. I would like to think that after many many years of writing, I have matured a bit. But only a little bit. Hey, don't get scared, this will not be anything extreme like I'm a woman hear me roar kind of junk. I'm just little ol' me becoming a bit more honest in what I say and how I say it and not giving a damn if it bothers anyone.
After all, not all in life is rainbows and unicorns. Even though my 7 year old would like to think so. So welcome to finally me being sincerely me.