My two daughters go to school this year, Camila and Sophia and I think I am going to feel abandoned and not needed. Right now I'm making plans like "when you go to school I'm going to clean this house spotless." Wait, what... is that all there is to it? Is that all I look forward to with my loneliness? It can't be. I sound boring.
So tight as I ponder about needing to get a life, I can't seem to find the right words to motivate myself to suck it up. Just suck it up! I got tons of material to work with and lots of projects I currently don't have the time for. I just hate, my life as I know it, is coming to an end.
Yes, I'm driven to almost chaos with all their arguing sometimes but that was ok, I will miss that. I will miss that? Sure I will. I think. That's how it usually goes, you miss the little things, right? Will I have time to write that super awesome novel I've got scribbled somewhere or focus more on my photography? At this point, I don't care. I just want that screaming and arguing. I'm going to miss that.
You know that point where you tell yourself, "they grow up so fast"? Well, this is it. Sophia enters middle school and Camila is entering school tomorrow and those days of having her home with me all day are gone. Gone. She has grown up and ready to be with a pretty teacher somewhere. Yes. I'm kinda jealous she'll get to see her for as long as I will. I'm not proud of this jealousy, it just is. She'll get to hear her quirky jokes and silly comments and face expression I love so much. She'll make her laugh while I'm focused on my "projects". Should I consider home school?
See, I'm not taking it so well and the anxiety is starting to creep its ugly face in. Sure, I'll have afternoons and weekends but I feel like I'm in a divorced situation with her new teacher and I'm not happy with the hours. Why does she get her all of a sudden? Why????
And with these many question marks I leave you. I am hoping my pre-Back to school anxiety will be just that... Pre and in not well post and I will be happy and chirpy and cheerful running around my house singing out loud with my iPod full blast.
Of no wait I forgot. I have a one year old. Oh yeah, she should be a lot of fun! Nevermind.
And once again I have my little spirit lifted that I will be good for something once again. (I'm being sarcastic, you know that right?)
That whole waking up at 6:30 am EVERY single day is going to suck though. It's going to such big time. Sigh. Did I mention I hate back to school? :(
Watching a movie on the last day of Summer vacation.